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 The Weapon-Shaped Message Boardwww.weapon-shaped.com/forumby Stephen Cody Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Stephen Cody (not my real name). I'm what most people would consider to be a fairly average guy with a knack for technology - don't get me wrong, I'm no "software expert", but I am a bit of a hobbyist. Part of this hobby includes keeping up on what's hot on the Internet. You name the site, and I've been there - msnbc.com, yahoo.com... even more edgy and lesser known sites like theonion.com and google. I thought I had seen everything! But nothing could prepare me for the harsh reality I would encounter when I rolled around and got the bed sheets tangled around my legs at the Weapon-Shaped forum. "I'm hard right now". "... That's right, I've got a fucking boner." I had no idea how to react. Manchovie had just declared himself to be erect, and I was simply too stunned to respond. I had always heard rumors about a dark side to the Net, a side of the Net full of the bizarre and unpredictable. But the thought of someone named "Manchovie", standing in front of his computer, showing such pride at such a threatening moment. I had no idea. And the frightening thing is that this was just getting started... I read onward, and my shock only grew: "last night i dreamed that i had an evil aunt who ran a inn/hotel/lodge in new hampshire on a lake called "moose lake" that was a lake in the shape of a moose. there was a path around the lake that was level and paved. anyway all my cousins on my moms side went there to celebrate christmas, and the evil aunt was offering people rooms like 'the lions den' and 'the lions den bed'. i got a little room. then i got chastised for smoking weed in the room. but it turns out they do a lot of cocaine in the lions den, they didn't care if i was high, evil aunt just didn't want her hotel to smell like weed smoke." Clearly the brazen, drug induced delusions of a dangerous individual named "lester". It was obviously related to other counter-culture works I had heard of such as The Beatles' (British band, 1964 - 1970) album Rubber Soul, and an album by a black musician called "Sketches of Spain". The open admissions of drug usage only further convinced me that this site was a seriously corrupt influence and possibly illegal. I promptly logged off of my dial up connection and closed my browser, to ensure that no one would ever know I had visited such a site. But I felt people had to know about this site, particularly to protect their children. After all, who can't resist the polite coaxing of Teddy Ruxpin? "Who's your favorite friend?" I rest my case. |
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