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 Of the many groups of people throughout the ages that have been targets of intense hatred, one of the most quirky are those fabulous, furry, friends of the earth, commonly known as-- the Hippies. Now I know what you're saying... "But Chris, The Irish have all those funny songs and stories about leprechauns," or "What about all those quirky Poles?" or "C'mon Let's kill some of those Gays!" But I believe that when looked at from an objective point of view, no other group is more inclusive and peppered with various customs and rituals than the hippies. Yes, like the patchwork skirts that they don, the hippies embody many flavors, varieties and odors all neatly interwoven into a durable and elegant "garment of friends." I have often found myself intrigued and beguiled with the hippies' distinctive ways. I admit I sometimes fell into the trap of judging them on their various choices in outerwear (or lack thereof) or hairstyles. However, with my recent relocation to Oregon, I was finally able to cast off my misconceptions and study these people from a firsthand perspective. This opportunity was heightened in the past weeks as my hometown of Eugene played host to the "Oregon Country Fair," a state-wide event that, much to the chagrin of the local redneck community, has turned into one of the most ultimate hippy-fests in the nation. Be warned, dear readers: what I report may shock you!  1) Hippies are unbelievably nice! They truly, truly are! They are quite accepting of anybody. I went to the fair extremely self-conscious about the Nike brand flip flops that I was wearing (purchased at Ross for 3.99). I thought for sure I would be spit on, firebombed, or at the very least had human scat hurled at me for supporting a company that supports globalism and exploitation of the 3rd world (via the Ross discount sandal bin). Wonderfully enough, not one person condemned me! At one point I even yelled out "I AM CHRIS WEISBART AND I WEAR NIKE SANDALS WHEN THEY ARE SOLD AT A DISCOUNT DUE TO DEFORMITIES IN THE MANUFACTURING PROCESS!" Nothing but smiles. 2) Hippies love to smoke pot. Now I don't touch the stuff personally, but it seemed that the hippies I ran into couldn't get enough of the stuff! I know that you've probably heard this before, but let me just confirm from the front lines of hippy-dom: cannabis sativa is here to STAY-tiva!
3) Hippies love stilts, people that walk on stilts, and many forms of gigantic puppetry and/or costumed stilt-walkers. This one blew me away. I mean I have heard of "getting high" but this is OUTRAGEOUS! Outrageous but true, folks! 4) More things hippies love: hackysack, frisbee, the multi-colored stick things you twirl using two other sticks, various other alternative sports (hunting EXCLUDED). 5) Hippies love love to sell crap! I mean who doesn't, but I hardly knew that the average hippy clan can be just as enterprising as the rest of us! I saw such a wide variety of capitalism going on it was hard to keep track: a woman selling 3 flowers for $5, an opportunity to take a picture inside a "Dead-Head" logo for $7 ($2 donation if you use your own camera... which, OF COURSE we did!!) and the buttons! So many buttons!!
All in all, I'd have to say my excursion to the Oregon Country Fair really changed my mind on these fascinating individuals. No longer are these people to ridicule and brush off as "drug addicts" or "child molesters" or "creepy." They are actually decent, freedom loving people who are very accepting of my awkward non-hippy ways. In fact, when an argument broke out in the line to our bus between an older gentleman who was selling "musical portraits" for $3 and a troupe of Tribal Dancers and drummers asking for donations in a gigantic wicker basket, I almost joined the crowd in shouting "Chill, man." Of course, I didn't... but I almost did... And that's the Oregon difference! So kids, until the next acorn drops from the top-most bough roun'd the ol' knobby pine wood tree, remember not to stray from... THE OREGON TRAIL!!! --CW Read The Oregon Trail Part 2: The Excellence of Emancipation Read The "Original" Oregon Trail |
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