by devon lester murphy and jamie flam

Wake up
Lipstick
Determine present location
Appropriate transportation home
Smoke Cigarette
Mix uppers and downers
Pose with daughter, Francis Bean for picture, kissing her on cheek
Give daughter to handlers
Find fix
Heroin
PCP
Champagne
Lipstick
Expose breasts
Scream
Soil smock
Laugh followed by quick belch
Botox injection
Expose vagina
Surf the web
Give cute guy at Hot Topic an HJ
Screech
Spit loogie
One and a half smokes
Lipstick
Positive affirmations
Find promising local musician, convince him to write songs for new Hole album, get him hooked on heroin, drive him to suicide
Drive by a court, flip off from limo window
Howl
Have sex with hot guy working at Jamba Juice
Get Stawberry Banana smoothie
Expose asshole
Two drags of cigarette, flick at passing bus
Lipstick
Methodone
Fellate policeman
Shriek
Take daily multivitamin
Four smokes
Two shots of Bacardi 151
Two more smokes
One shot of Aftershock
NY Times crossword
Yell "Fuck you, motherfucker!" at guy wearing Smashing Pumpkins shirt
Douche with vodka
Send illegible letter written in mascara to district supervisor
Hike up dress and piss on kid's bicycle in park
Incoherent, possibly racial slur
Audition for film role as a junkie whore
Smoke a lot
Three shots of Martini Ranch Vodka
Speak at PETA Rally, expose breasts
Kick rabbit
Eat carefully prepared Vegan dinner
Throw up carefully prepared Vegan dinner
Lipstick
Nap
Chain smoke and stare at wall
Bleach hair
Fuck someone
Shave head
Freebase cocaine
Kiss daughter goodnight...from telephone in strip club lobby
Go to Vegas
Throw blackjack table on ground, scream
Cry on bridge
Fix makeup
Cry more on bridge
Pick up a john, fuck, then punch in the face
Remark how shitty Vegas is
Suck off bellhop in elevator
Yell profanities at television airing I Love Lucy reruns in island-themed bar
Call, hang up on Dennis Rodman
Allow bar patron to say "Hey, aren't you..." before breaking glass on his head
Stomp on bar patron's testicles, scream "I'm nobody's anything!"
Kiss limo driver on mouth
Explain that sores only come up every few weeks
Smother lipstick on limo driver against his wishes
Laugh hysterically
Hire private plane to take to Seattle.
Chapstick
Try to call mother from cell phone while on airplane
Throw phone against door to pilot's cabin
Shit/vomit in airplane bathroom
Mini-seizure
Set blouse on fire
Extinguish with red wine
Curse then cry about staining blouse
Run third degree burns under cold water
Glass of tequila
Speed
Smoke half a pack
Threaten suicide with Bic pen
Attempt suicide with mechanical pencil
Cough violently
Write illegible letter to Dixon Ticonderoga demanding pencil be more conducive to suicide
Ciggy or two
Lipstick
Call Ed Norton, knowing he changed number 6 years ago
Destroy all copies of Hole and Weird Al Yankovic albums in Virgin Megastore
Croon impromptu lyrics to new song, "Keri Russel is an underweight cunt bitch whore"
Punch magazine rack
Quick phone interview with Miami Herald
Brief pause for vomiting
Yoga
Make out with sexy motherfucker at L.L. Bean
Call back Miam Herald interviewer, explain: "If you ever want to see your fucking testicles again, DO NOT print this interview."
Go to bar, use Corona bottle as proxy-penis, bump into ass of every patron then fall down outside bathroom door
Bark at crowd of Asian tourists
Donate blood - steal band-aids, gauze
Get "Born to Live" tattoo on left breast, explain deep meaning to Stu who really gets it
Anal with Stu
Watch The Goonies
Curse at fat kid
Six-pack of Lowenbrau
Vow to fuck Sean Astin in near future
Be convinced of heart stoppage, call ambulance
Watch end of Goonies, scream "Faggots!"
Kick E.M.T. in shins
Get to hospital
Technically die for 8 seconds
Get stomatch pumped
Morphine drip
Couple smokes
Lipstick
Watch sunrise