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Or... At Work, Bored, Sleep Deprived and Psychotic by jason betrue, jamie flam, and paws o'henry Milk is one of those "few things in life." But take it away and all of a sudden conundrums appear. So please read this for informative information. Unless of course... Well, you get the pictures! As they say: LIST BELOW. 1. It appeals to a wide spectrum of people in many land-countries 2. Commercials 3. Try it from a thermos! 4. Funny because it's True?  5. All of the other Got ____? that have sprung up as a result of it. 6. So many varieties (homogenized, coffeemate) 7. Video Killed The Radio Star 8. SHUT THE FUCK UP! 9. It really does go QUITE WELL with chocolate 10. Radio killed the VIDEO star?!?! (Think about it.) 11. Semen implications = GOLD... WHITE gold. 12. See 11 (cummmmm) 13. No batteries required ;) 14. Tons of cereal sold daily 15. Potential radio ad campaign 16. Breast feeding is fun 17. White on black looks killer on a billboard in Pasadena 18. The Pull-Out Method 19. Because sometimes the answer to the question is "No." 20. Milk unicorn 21. Is necessary for hundreds, nay, THOUSANDS, of recipes 22. Cows 23. Got soda? (HAHAHAHHAHA) 24. Don't underestimate the importance of the cum thing we mentioned earlier. 25. Picnics, etc. 26. Because movie and television and music (and video) stars all LOVE it's delicious taste. 27. Apple Quicktime 28. The Land of Milk and.... (ocean wave sounds) 29. Reminiscent of Titty-Sucking 30. JURASSSSIC MIIILK 31. "From the beginning of time" 32. You want the milk... YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE MILK!!! 33. Director of American Beauty, Sam Mendes 34. Remember the one with the kid from Home Improvement that prefers the company of men? 35. Magnesia! 36. Comes from cow-tummies 37. Polishing brass 38. Because what if there was a million times as much milk on the celebrity's lip and they drowned in it. 39. Chinese milk torture 40. It does a body BAAAAAD (opposites attract) 41. S.P.E.R.M. EPILOGUE - A short history of milk (for context): Milk has been in the solar system for many years. It has nutrients and vitamins so drink it for sports. Did you know that milk sometimes has hormones? Hormones are always good for you because they are enriching. I wonder if dinosaurs drank milk!?!?! :) Appendix: pawsopenhead: I think this is funny, but looking over it afresh, no one is going to get any of these sweet boy guy: they shouldn't pawsopenhead: but won't they resent us for making them feel stupid? sweet boy guy: don't you think the [second] title implies that they shouldn't understand pawsopenhead: i dont think theyll understand the title pawsopenhead: unless they know its you and jason who're bored at work sweet boy guy: ill make it make sense sweet boy guy: i mean sweet boy guy: at the very least make people think we are the idiots, so they don't pawsopenhead: bear in mind, i think its funny. but i know you guys. pawsopenhead: i think someone reading in say, chicago, will just go, what? what's the joke? sweet boy guy: i think the subtitle implies we know it makes no sense sweet boy guy: and some pics will spice it up sweet boy guy: and the intro makes no sense pawsopenhead: well, yeah pawsopenhead: it doesnt make sense pawsopenhead: but here i am in chicago, wasting time at work sweet boy guy: no you're not pawsopenhead: yes, I totally am! And though i like the phrase "At work, Sleep Deprived and Psychotic" I'm not sure if that's part of the title or what, and i'm not sure who it refers to pawsopenhead: And I don't know that this is a site by a bunch of guys who write features at work sweet boy guy: so what you are trying to say is... DANGER pawsopenhead: hahaha pawsopenhead: kind of. sweet boy guy: DANGER FEATURE pawsopenhead: RED ALERT sweet boy guy: "smoke detector says: DANGER WARNING" sweet boy guy: i will just go ahead and include this transcript at the bottom pawsopenhead: hahaha pawsopenhead: ok sweet boy guy: seriously. so say something mildly retarded to end it pawsopenhead: jamie, we just lost a lot of chicago readers pawsopenhead: this will cost us millions sweet boy guy: "But I've kept my pride." pawsopenhead: damn it, i thought i got the last word sweet boy guy: suck it.  |
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